You Know You are married to a Thai Lady When……

I found this on the Internet many years ago.  Can’t remember where.  So  apologies for not being able to thank the original Author.

Any Thai Ladies reading this, please do not be offended.  It is meant to be a bit of fun 🙂

You know you are married to a Thai Lady when…

• She expects you to be able to read her mind, just by watching her eyebrows move up and down and noticing her expression.
• As soon as you are married, you have 100 new close relatives that you can’t tell apart.
• The refrigerator is always full. But it can be hard to find any food that you recognise.  This is also where she keeps her cosmetics and perfume.  If it keeps food fresh, then it must keep these ‘valuables’ fresh too!
• You are not allowed to sleep until you’ve hugged her for at least an hour.
• There are a few knives in your kitchen, but there is one multi purpose cleaver in your kitchen drawer that’s used for opening coconuts, butchering a chicken and spreading jam.
• Your phone bill is all for calls to some Thailand, which last for an average 3 hours per call.
• Before your first holiday together, she will pack the entire contents of her wardrobe into 4 giant suitcases and explain that it’s so she has something to wear. You give up trying to explain that you are only going to Chiang Mai for the weekend – not emigrating.
• Everything in your house was bought on sale, special offers or buy one get one free. Even if you don’t need it. As long as it was a “bargain”, that’s all that matters.
• Nothing second hand is allowed within 100 metres of the house.  (our house is now furnished with antiques, but that’s another interesting story)
• All the vegetables she buys in the local market look like they were grown at near a nuclear Power Plant.
• Her sister first visited you in 2008, right now you’re wondering when she’ll be returning back home.
• She’s done her best job planning a surprise for you if she doesn’t tell you more than two weeks before the event happens.
• Last, but definitely not least, the most important thing to remember is – YOU PAY.  You are the man.

I will now wait for Pat to read this………………. and chase me with the meat cleaver !

 

Robert